Romance Scams in the US: Warning Signs and What to Do
By Michael Reed, Founder of DateSteady. Updated October 2026.
A romance scam can start on any dating app or social network. This page explains the warning signs of a romance scam, the rules that protect you, and what to do in the United States if it happens to you or someone you love.
What is a romance scam?
A romance scam is when someone builds an online relationship to win your trust and then uses it to take your money. The scammer poses as a potential partner, invests weeks or months in the conversation, and then produces a crisis, an "opportunity" or travel costs that need money from you.
The warning signs of a romance scam
- Love too fast. Strong declarations of love within days, before you have met.
- Always a reason not to video call. A broken camera, a bad connection, shyness: anything to avoid showing a live face.
- A life you cannot check. An overseas job, an oil rig, a military posting, or a story that does not quite add up.
- Pressure to leave the app. A quick push to move to text, WhatsApp or email, away from moderation.
- The ask. Eventually, money: for an emergency, customs fees, travel to see you, or an "investment".
The rules that protect you
- If someone you met online asks for money, treat it as a scam. A partner you have never met in person does not need your money.
- Never send money, gift cards or cryptocurrency to someone you have not met in person.
- Keep conversations on the app until you trust the person. Moderation and scam detection only work where the conversation happens.
- Insist on a live video call before any in-person meeting.
- Do not share your home address, bank details or intimate images with someone you have not met.
- Report and block at the first red flag. Reporting protects the next person too.
What to do if it happens to you in the US
- Stop all contact and do not send any more money.
- Contact your bank or card issuer straight away and ask whether a payment can be stopped or reversed.
- Report it to the Federal Trade Commission at ReportFraud.ftc.gov.
- Report it to the FBI's Internet Crime Complaint Center at ic3.gov, especially if money was sent.
- Report the profile on the dating app and keep a record of the conversation.
There is no shame in being targeted. These scams are run by organized groups, and reporting helps protect others.
How DateSteady helps
A phone number is confirmed before anyone can send you a message, photos are screened when they are uploaded, and every profile shows which checks are complete in a public Trust Score. Photos cannot be sent inside private messages at all, messages are scanned for scam patterns, and reporting and blocking are free. DateSteady does not run criminal background checks, and no service can promise that everyone is honest, so the rules above still matter.
Read the full guide: romance scams: warning signs and how to avoid them.
Common questions
Where do I report a romance scam in the US?
Report it to the Federal Trade Commission at ReportFraud.ftc.gov and to the FBI at ic3.gov, and contact your bank straight away if you sent money.
How can I tell if someone is a romance scammer?
Watch for love declared very quickly, excuses to avoid video calls, pressure to leave the app, and any request for money.
Can romance scams happen on paid dating sites?
Yes. Scammers use free and paid sites alike. What helps is checking what a site verifies, keeping conversations on the app and never sending money.